The Impact Of Perfectionism.
Hi, I’m Kate and I'm a recovering perfectionist. I’ve been in recovery for 4 to 5 years now.
It’s funny how we don’t go out and speak about perfectionism like it’s a serious problem. In fact, if somebody is a perfectionist, we often look at it favourably. We know they’ll always do a good job. It just might take a little longer.
The truth is, however, if you have a level of perfectionism, it likely ranges from making you unproductive to being seriously debilitating. That inner critic always in your head, chipping away at every little thing you do is totally exhausting. Particularly as perfectionists classically don’t tend to ask for help. It’s all part of our all-or-nothing attitude.
What seems on the outside to be a Goldilocks-like desire to have everything ‘just right’, quickly evolves into a time-wasting, procrastinating, anxiety-fuelling, happiness sap. In our quest to be perfect, we’re permanently questioning ourselves and our decisions. Self-doubt becomes part of the everyday. Anxiety can actually manifest itself in our bodies and make us unwell.
On top of all this, because the downsides of perfectionism are not something we tend to talk about, it can actually be quite isolating. Suddenly, you find yourself spending Friday nights with a bowl of ice cream, singing (read: screaming) Celine Dion’s ‘aaall byyyy myyyyself’.
“Perfectionism is self-harm from the inside”
so the saying goes. This quote, which I love to share, may seem a little dramatic but I think it’s fair to say perfectionism can take its toll.
We all need a little help now and then. Here are a few of my favourite tools for getting on top of the perfectionism time suck.
The Bronze-to-Platinum Tool
Halt procrastination in its tracks by assigning each task a level of importance between bronze and platinum. The level assigned determines how much importance you place on each task and how much time you spend on them.
So, something at bronze level means just do it (aka Nike style). Don’t spend extra time on it. It doesn’t have to be perfect; it just has to be done. Things like replying to emails would fall into this category.
Silver needs a little more time but still needs to be done in a relatively small timeframe. Planning a meeting might fall here.
Gold level is of higher importance and will need a little more perfecting. Still, decide how much time you’re going to assign to it and stick to it.
Platinum (cue the trumpets) is where your total excellence is required. Major projects would fall into this category. Higher perfectionism levels are permitted here, but remember it’s still important to always set a time limit and hold yourself to it even at platinum level.
No task is worth trading in your wellbeing.
Make a Mistake on Purpose.
What?
Yes, you read that right. I want you to make a mistake on purpose. Then I want you to do it again.
Try not to freak out!
We perfectionists don’t like to be seen as failing. Let’s be real, nobody does. The magic of making a mistake on purpose, of sitting in that feeling and getting used to it, is that it normalises the discomfort. It’s actually incredibly liberating when you realise the world doesn't fall apart just because you made a mistake.
Pomodoro
The Pomodoro technique is a game-changing time management system. A quick search will bring up countless apps available. Pomodoro is a timer that runs for 25 minutes at a time. The idea is you press go and focus entirely on a task for 25 minutes. At the end of this time, the alarm will go off and you take a 5-minute break, no matter where you are up to with your task.
It’s up to you whether you come back to the same task in your next round or move on and revisit any uncompleted tasks later, but make sure you get up, walk around, make a cup of tea; whatever constitutes an effective 5-minute break away from the task at hand.
After four sets of Pomodoro, you take a longer break of 15-30 minutes. This allows the brain to reset, rest and assimilate information, making you more productive. It’s also an informative wake-up call when a timer goes off and you realise you’ve spent a whole 25 minutes on one small section of a task. This tool really helped me figure out where I was consistently losing the most time.
Stop letting your perfectionism turn into procrastination. Give these methods a shot.
I’d love you to join my private Facebook group The Executive Lounge,
and let me know how these tools and strategies worked for you. If you have your own anti-time-suck systems, come share them with us too.
Our group is sort of like the AA meeting place for perfectionists as well as being a supportive and nurturing environment for like-minded executive women who want to live their most fulfilling, harmonious life. I jump in regularly and provide a variety of valuable and complementary tools to help you on your journey.